Friday, July 10, 2009

How did I get here?

I always thought those people you see on Discovery Health who way 800 lbs are nuts - how did they let that happen? Wouldn't you get to 500 and be like "hmm...maybe I should turn this train around?"

I was wrong and I am ashamed for thinking those thoughts. I also shouldn't be judging other people when I am obese.

I got a taste of my own medicine. I gained weight and fast and I was on track to keep gaining and gaining. I couldn't see it. I could only tell in pictures. My eyes looking in the mirror hadn't adjusted to how I was really looking. I also remember watching the first season of Celebrity Fit Club and at the time, Mia Tyler weighed about 5lbs more than me but I thought she looked waaaaaaaaaaaaaay bigger. That couldn't be - we're similar heights. I couldn't see it on me.

I need to prepare for this in reverse, too. So many folks lose the weight and they still see their fat self. There I was, pushing 250 and I saw 220. It may sound nice, but I still thought I was fat (just not that fat) and it was leading me to gain more weight.

4 comments:

Lisa said...

Wow! i could have wrote this!

Fat Girl said...

It's nice to think that there are some universal experiences out there. Being fat just feels so isolating and taboo. You can't talk about it with people, if you even know anyone as fat or fatter than you.

This is nice - knowing that people know what you're going through.

Chavonne said...

I found your blog after you commented on my post on 3 Fat Chicks. I feel like I hear so much of my story in yours. I so look forward to hearing your journey. I know you'll succeed--your insight is remarkable.

Fat Girl said...

Chavonne - thank you so much. You don't know what the means to me.

I have been doing this blog for a year with literally no readers and no way of knowing if anyone else could relate to anything I experience.

Thank you again for your support.