Loneliness

I started this blog to try to connect with people and share myself with people anonymously in away I otherwise could not.

It's more difficult than I thought. I do not feel like I am connecting with anyone or that anyone reads this. It's undermining my desire to post. I'm starting to understand why so many people began and gave up.

Maybe I shouldn't give up so soon - maybe it will be five years before anyone reads this. Maybe it will be never. I guess I'll keep going. Maybe the fact that no one is reading it will make it easier to post. I kept thinking, "what if someone I know reads this and knows that it is me?" I keep another blog and I wanted to make sure I don't say anything that could identify me - post similar events on similar days. I think I'm being paranoid.

I am starting to think this blog isn't even interesting. Maybe there is nothing special about my story. I'm just another fat girl.